Martial Rantists:

The (In)complete Martial Law.

Hello, and welcome to the (less dis)organized version of my Martial Law rants page. It's still rather experimental, so there might be some not-so-subtle format changes in the future.

(Skip this mess, I just wanna see an episodic menu.) (Skip even more and show me the recent updates.)

Disclaimer: In case you don't know me, (to wit: if you got here from the link on Lee Goldberg's Martial Law page and not because you read my main page) you're about to get the crash course. My sense of humor is seriously bent. Just read the annotated index or recent updates for a quick idea. Some of my humor is libelous, some is disturbing, some is parody (often of the fanboy mentality), and some is truth that just happens to be funny. In the end, all of my most disturbing (and illegal...) commentaries are false. Or the truth twisted so badly that it is as good as a lie. I'm actually somewhat normal. Also: What's left after the lies are gone is opinion. If you're offended, you're offended. Not my fault, as I'm not forcing you to read: your curiosity is your own downfall.

Well, with the unpleasantries out of the way, let's get on to....

    The Framed Version: Which doesn't work well unless you're on the super-private banner-ad free version of my site.
    The Index: You're reading it.
    The Annotated Index: Like my surreal item headings but hate the actual items? The headings are all here, freed of their text by my m4D QB4s1c pR0gR4mm1ng 5kil1z.
    Sitemap V1.1: The Martial Law section of my sitemap.
    The Original Page: Organized chronologically, and no longer updated. All future updates can be found on:

    Chronicles, Litanies, and Fanboy Obsessions: Martial Law miscellany only obliquely related to the show proper. Its three (or so) subpages are...
    Recent Updates: I'll let you puzzle this one out yourself.
    The Egolf Chronicles: A trip through the mind of an atypical Gretchen Egolf fan.
    The (Previous) Egolf Chronicles: A slightly older trip through the mind of a slightly younger Gretchen Egolf fan.
    Len's Lack-of-Sleep Litanies: Television and dream-sequence cameos by the Martial Law stars. And some general whining.
    The Previous Litanies: Some more general whining, this time with a hint of decrepitude for flavor. (These are the older rants.)

..."Litanies" also features several one-off sub-rants, namely...
    The Progenitor Rant: The "Sammo Blammo" rant that spawned this whole mess.
    Midseries Metamorphosis: The rather wordy rant about the between-season changes.

Or, you could read the actual episodic rants. All 44+ of them. If so, you have far too much time on your hands. Keep scrolling downward to see the fantastic episodic nonstandardic HTMLic table-ic.

Season One: The Beginning

01: Shanghai Express

02: Diamond Fever

03: Dead Ringers

04: Funny Money

05: Cop Out

06: Extreme Measures

07: Trackdown

08: Takeout

09: How Sammo Got His Groove Back

10: Bad Seed

11: Lock-Up

* * *

12: Painted Faces

13: Substitutes

14: Wildlife

15: Breakout

16: Captive Hearts

17: Trifecta

18: Big Trouble

19: Nitro Man

20: Red Storm

21: Requiem (Part One)

22: End Game (Part Two)

Season One: The End

Season Two: The Beginning

01: Sammo Blammo

02: Thieves Among Thieves

03: This Shogun for Hire

04: 24 Hours

05: 90 Million Reasons to Die

06: My Man Sammo

07: The Friendly Skies

08: Call of the Wild

09: Blue Flu

10: Sammo Claus

11: No Quarter

* * *

12: Scorpio Rising

13: No Fare

14: Dog Day Afternoon

15: Deathfist 5: Major Crimes Unit

16: Honor Among Strangers

17: Freefall

18: The Thrill is Gone

19: Heartless

20: In the Dark

21: Final Conflict, Part 1

22: Final Conflict, Part 2

Season Two: The End

Season One, Part One | Season One, Part Two | Midseries Metamorphosis | Season Two, Part One | Season Two, Part Two
The Index | The Annotated Index | The Progenitor Rant | The Original Page
Chronicles, Litanies, and Fanboy Obsessions: (Recent Updates)
The Egolf Chronicles: Current | May 2001 - February 2002 | February 2002 - July 2002
Len's Lack-of-Sleep Litanies | The (Previous) Litanies

Run along home.

This site and everything on it are Copyright (C) The Archon 1999 - 2005, unless otherwise noted. So there.
Oh, and if you use this stuff without my permission (except for the stuff I've taken from others without their permission...), I'll hurt you.
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